Give us a G, give us an A, give us anS, and give us an H, what have you got…………….Eclipse Cricket club!!
After weeks of deluge the long awaitedstart to the season finally got underway on Wednesday only to be followed by adeluge of wickets namely ours!
So the weather was sunny (and warm) andthe team assembled at St Fagan’s to play against our old adversaries TheCardiff Bay Barbarians.
Hopefully the local sports discountwarehouses have done well during the winter as a plethora of new gleaming shinybats came in to focus with Brizer, Lee (extracting his from a purpose madesheath), and Simon all displayed their magnificent weapons in front of theadoring crowd who were amazed at the sight of the sheen and unmarked slabs ofwhiteness before them. Unfortunately it was to be that these magnificentweapons retained their splendour and remained almost unmarked come the end ofthe evening.
So with thereal captains unavailable the task of leading the team to victory fell to the youngpretender Luke who like his predecessors proved himself to be an absolutetosser with the coin and to make the most of the light and with a pitch cut astight as the purves Missus decided to bat.
The ever reliableChris commented on the strength of the batting order and that “We bat down tonumber 11 today”, so what could possibly go wrong?
The captain’snext decision was to determine the batting order. Our ever reliable Chrisinserted his junior size box and proceeded to the wicket with his new partner,Fari (batting partner that is). Was this the right thing to do? Obviously not.5 balls in to the second over Fari, remembering his young free and single days,chased a wide one to edge to a well taken catch at slip. In quick time the everreliable Chris lived up to expectations to leave a full toss and have his legstump removed, the only answer could be that the ball moved “by a foot “in theair. I’m sure we all agree that it did.
Two down fornot very many so Niluka and Simon agreed to get the show back on the road and afew lusty drives by Niluka got the score board ticking and the umpire’s fingerstwitching. However the show turned out to “Cartoon capers” as Nilu was lategetting down (his wife says that ahs always been a problem) to a fuller balland lost middle and leg. Simon, bearing the weapon that had brought so muchsuccess the previous night (or so Gill tells me because I was not there),displayed some solid play benefitting from being caught out from a no ball (whenthe umpires decision was finally made) and went on to make a creditable 18before becoming another bowled victim. Lee had since unsheathed and was lookingpotent but having explained he had never faced a left hand over the wicketbefore then the writing was on the wall, in fact the writing was on the verynext ball, stumps shattered. When all was looking lost, 5 down for not so manyafter 5 overs it needed a real man to step to the plate, I was not padded up soLuke went in. A captain’s inningsproceeded and apart from the occasion mincing between the wickets (obviouslyinspired by the new pink balls) a magnificent display of drives and pullsstarted to drive the score upwards.
All goodthings come to an end and when Simon became the next bowled victim the stagewas set for our most improved player of the season 2011 to set his stall. Weall know of “the curse” that sits with this honour and it was no surprise that “themost improved” left without scoring and sought deep in his trouser pockets thepound coin that would later pay for his misdemeanour.
Never mind “HandyAndy Powell” our new recruit who had always been the scourge of Eclipse whenplaying against us was sure to see us through this crises but never having hadsuch responsibility before (when he played for a good team) the occasion provedtoo much (or perhaps it was the pressure of having the impress the stand inskipper at the other end) and relinquished his wicket for nought and withlittle more than a whimper. More money in the fines tin please!!
Brizer,feeling good with new weapon in hand immediately delivered a huge red mark onthe edge of his new bat to get off the mark. The bat was to remain “untouched”as a few balls later and “absolute scorcher which moved feet off the pitch” (reporterslicence) removed a number of stumps. “No ball”??....no chance.
Looking likewe would not see out 12 overs “Six Hit Steve” strode to the wicket and togetherwith Luke made everything look so simple ( for a while anyway). The pinkie spedto all parts of the ground as we approached the 100 mark which was achieved witha huge 6 from the skipper. Having scored17 valuable runs Six Hit then had a toe hit and Niluka raised the dreadedfinger (we assume he was fined for this later in the evening) and we were doneto number 11. Unfortunately “The Purve” having become obsessed with thought ofPink balls, Barbie, and flaps had trouble concentrating and after a few wavesof the bat succumbed in the usual manner. 103 all out, not the best way tostart the new season. The captain for the night Luke remained resplendent on 32Not Out, this man needs to be up the order.
Wearing newinspiring team shirts we headed on to the field in hope as we had defendedworse positions in the past so all was not lost. Luke and Fari opened theaffray and in no time the wides had started to add up. The once so difficultpitch now appeared to have become a docile as a 6 week old puppy as the openersnotched up the runs without issue. Brizer replaced Luke and proceeded to throwa number of full tosses down leg side that got what they deserved. Six HitSteve twirled a few but the batsmen twirled them to the boundary. “Handy Andy” ournew recruit who had always been the scourge of Eclipse when playing againstus etc etc had no success and was on theend of the final big blast that sent the ball sailing over the boundary for thegame to be lost……….by 10 wickets.
There weresome highlights, well done Niluka and Fari in the field, “The Purve” inspiredby having his hands deep into Barbie performed to his usual high standards onthe field, and Gavin was at his usual enthusiastic best.
An attendeeon the day to watch on the day was Fari 2, Fari’s brother who has a bigger reputationthan Vince with a camera in the showers and who was heard to mutter G A S H atthe pathetic effort displayed before him, mind you a better performance nextweek may encourage him to join the band of brothers and propel us towardsleague and cup glory.
Never mind, thebad one is out of the way early this year, from here the only way is up.
Brian “Dogger”Condon